He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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