I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
