yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
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