Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
it glows. i had to have it.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
