I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
