You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
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