How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Dick very happy bro
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
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