I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
