We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
