she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
