I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Randomize
