i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
