Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
