I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
