If that was your dad, he is hot
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
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