Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
