All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
