Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
