i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
