no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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