this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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