i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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