White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
