just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Randomize