WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
