we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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