toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
