i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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