marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
More tranny stories later!
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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