Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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