No, drunk sperm still make babies.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
