Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
The air was thick with penises
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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