let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
