how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
