I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
