Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Watching her eat just hurts me
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Randomize
