I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
