we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
