On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
