OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Even my vagina gasped.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
