hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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