me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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