Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
