You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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