i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
