The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
