capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
