is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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