You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
This girl is more easily done than said...
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
