Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
North Korea, Best Korea!
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
