We won't sleep together?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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